What the hell has happened to this blog? My readers want to know. Just yesterday I received this comment on a post from someone named 5homebusiness:
Very interesting website. Keep up the outstanding work and thank you...
i am collect any idea of home business, if you have - please, add to my cat! Thank you!
No, thank you
5homebusiness! I will definitely be adding to your cat! Your kind words are appreciated.
That's what I like the best about the interweb. That feeling of community! Each day I receive dozens and dozens of personal emails offering to titilate me, make me more virile (as if that were possible!), or make me rich. But despite all these helpful friends, I've fallen into a bit of a funk lately. I've found it very difficult to scratch together enough will to write anything, and even when I've started I find it too easy to say, "who cares?" and walk away from it without finishing.
This funk's genesis is threefold. First, I'm getting a little frustrated in my job search. You might think an electrical engineer in 'hi-tech' Ottawa would have little difficulty getting employment, but you'd be wrong. I've applied to umpteen dozen positions that I would be suitable for, but have had no luck getting even an interview. After sending out so many CVs and cover letters and getting no response, you start to question your value as a person. It would be nice if the HR departments of these companies could send out a note when the position was filled, thanking you for your effort. It would be a message that they respect you and treat you seriously. But of course they don't. One HR person I talked to (after I called to ask what was going on) confided that they had a person in mind before the position was even offered. The job posting was just a phoney corporate ritual. He couldn't understand why I was offended by this information.
The second reason is children's daily attendence at school, starting last September. Although I certainly complained about having to look after them -- and they are a major handful -- they gave a purpose to my day, and to my life. That's what I did: I was a stay-at-home dad. Maybe it wasn't exactly what I wanted to be, but it was something -- and now it's gone. They're still keeping me very busy, but our collective cultural superego is telling me that as a educated male, I should be working at an office and bringing home a paycheck. My wife is telling me this too.
Third, the weather has just sucked around here lately. I'm not much of an outdoors person, but by my reckoning we've had almost no sun in two months. Ghod, it's been grim. It's been a grey and damp autumn and I don't know how much longer of this I can take. But I don't see a tropical vacation for me on the horizon.
So there it is. I know there are many people in worse straits than me, and I have so much to be thankful for. But that doesn't innoculate you from catching a funk. I know this stuff is pretty dull to read about, so I won't be making these whiney pity posts a regular part of the exciting Autonomous Source experience. But I just had to get this out there so I can start my process of de-funkification. This blog will return to its regular state (whatever that is) shortly.